We're back on the water....!

As soon as the temperature rises over 40°F, everyone at the boat house gears up to go out on the river. A long winter of weight lifting, low cardio erg (rowing machine) days, threshold erg days, more weight lifting and back to the erg has got boring. Neon green jackets, hats and pogies appear again and by 7am, rowers are in a pack around the coach waiting for boat assignments. It's too cold for singles - the water temperature is still really low and flipping into the water is more likely in a single scull - so it's doubles and quads.

I'd been training regularly all winter, at least five days a week, and was eager to get back in a boat. The regattas were already listed in my calendar, including the Fisa Masters Worlds regatta which would be in Canada this year, and easy for us to get to. Being an international competition, this annual regatta moves around, like the Olympics, so getting to places like Latvia or Austria isn't easy.

My first low point when I learned about the cancer and the length of the treatment, was that I'd miss the rowing season. I couldn't believe it, after all the hard work this winter! I was really, really angry.........and sad. Sometimes, when faced with traumatic events, we cling to the routines in our life that make sense. Rowing at the crack of dawn, chatting to my friends and complaining about the coffee at our local diner was what I did every morning. This cancer thing was going to impact my schedule in a huge way, especially since I'd be able to see everyone out on the river, hear the coaches yelling from their launch, which I watched from my kitchen window.

People think of grief as something you only feel when a loved one dies, but I think we go through the same stages of grieving when something major happens and changes our life as we knew it. When I was 30 I had knee surgery and was told I'd never be able to run or jump again. I remember feeling totally miserable. Life would never be the same. Slowly, I got used to the new knee - and life resumed. I think this breast cancer challenge will be the same. I hope so.