A total mystery

You're probably all sick to death of me rabbiting on about my hair, but something major is bothering me and I need to talk it through.

OK, so recapping what we all know from my previous posts ........ after the second chemo treatment, your hair falls out. From your head as well as from all other body parts. Eyelashes seems to be a question mark, but everything else goes. Hard fact supposedly.

Since this, added to the chemo, is a fairly catastrophic event, most people prepare for it by cutting their hair short, getting wigs, buying fancy hats and scarves, and shaving their head. That's what I did. You can see the result in the photo of me with my son, Sebastian.

So I had my second chemo treatment and waited for the stubble to rub off my head. To be frank, I was really looking forward to it coming out because let me tell you-- there is one major drawback to having a shaved head. The top of your head feels like it's coated in the hook side of a Velcro pad. Every time you put on a T-shirt or sweater, your neck jerks back as the 'hooks' catch in the fabric and it's not that easy prying your clothes off your head. It is really very, very irritating.

You'd also be surprised at how cold your head gets with no hair -- I had no idea it would be so drastic. I even had to wear a beanie in bed on chilly nights, which for some reason made me think of Charles Dickens and the Victorians, when men wore pointed nightcaps and ladies covered their heads in frilly-edged bonnets.

Another bizarre thing kept happening when I was newly shaved -- I kept whacking my head against everything, not something I normally do and I just couldn't figure it. I came to the conclusion that our hair must be like cat's whiskers --if we brush against something with our hair, it sends a signal to the brain, "Watch out! Too close!! Step back!!!". I've learned to compensate, but it was very odd.

So now we come to the conundrum. This morning, I had my FOURTH chemo treatment and my stubble is still there!! Why?! Without getting graphic, I'll share with you that nothing much has happened in the other hair departments either. I don't get it. Dr. Z, Mary at the Smilow Breast Center, the internet and my friends L and S were all quite adamant that I'd lose my hair between treatments two and three.

I keep rubbing my head (feels quite nice if you go with the 'grain') and can feel a couple of slightly smoother spots on top of my head, but I can't see them. However hard you try, it's next to impossible to see the top of your own head, especially if you're wearing progressive lenses. Maybe it's just coming out really slowly? Maybe the chemo isn't working (though Dr. Z says it is)? Or maybe my hair is just so strong that it's refusing to go down without a fight.

That's my mystery. I just don't know.